SPIRITUAL PROSPERITY

Internal defeat is a mindset, where you begin to believe that most new ideas will fail. You might think -”After all, what I tried in last week's Yoga class, failed.”

You will always learn from mistakes.  When you see them clearly as a test, examine the results, and study them closely for the reason why they went wrong.

Whether it is a lesson plan, trying mantras, Hot Yoga, Gentle Yoga, a pro shop, or trying anything new, it is better to make mistakes than do nothing at all.

Some of the most successful Yoga teachers, I know, deal with mistakes as part of the learning curve. They turn all of their defeats into learning experiences. This is extremely powerful when you consider the cost of learning anything of value.

After all, what did you spend on your education, so far? Did you think you would stop learning at a certain point in life? Did you learn from your past mistakes? Of course you did, and now you are stronger due to the corrective adjustments, you have made.

When a child learns to ride a bicycle, there are plenty of falls along the way, and then the falling stops. However, even skilled adults fall off bicycles, sometimes.

So, don’t take past failures personally. Put them behind you and learn from each one.

Henry Ford and the Wright Brothers had failures, but nobody seems to remember that. Just like them, you are not a failure, but you may have failed in the past, just like they did. When you get down on yourself, look back at what you have accomplished.

When you take on your next project, do the research first, assemble a team, make a full commitment to succeed, and never mentally quit before you start.

Lastly, whenever it is possible, learn from the mistakes of others. This is why Yoga businesses approach me for consulting services: To save money by avoiding known mistakes, pitfalls, and traps.

Living with joy can sometimes be a challenge.  When things appear to be going against our will, we tend to experience this as pain, suffering, or that we’re having a bad day.  Recognizing that we are in control of our feelings, and that we have the choice to live in joy, or in fear is the first step to creating a life full of joy and positivity.

One principle that we all need to acquire is the ability to see all situations, people, and events from a positive perspective.  Instead of viewing bad things in life as a prompt to get upset and angry, try to view the “bad things” as lessons that are helping you grow, helping you to become as whole of an individual as possible.  Too many times, we think that the outer world, the physical reality is creating our day, causing us to be sad or unhappy; however it is the opposite that is true.  We create our day, we create the circumstances for joyous living.

The most important lesson is that “beingness” precedes experience.  In order to be happy, we first need to “be happy” inside, and this internal happiness radiates outward through every cell of our bodies and creates the outer experience of a smile, or a laugh, or an intimate connection between two people.  It is in this “beingness” that we have the ability to see and to choose our feelings, desires, goals, and dreams, which then enables us to manifest an outer reality based on our true selves.

We create the reality in which we experience joy, anger, love, and fear.  Because we have the ability, the free will, to choose our reality, we can make that conscious choice to try to just be happier, more grateful, and more sensitive.  This happiness though will never come if you are looking outside of yourself first.  Because, what we just learned is that in order to be happy we have to have the internal feeling of happiness to then create that happiness in our daily lives.   Remember that your beliefs about reality create your experience of it.

So, start changing your negatives into positives, gain clarity, and open your heart by looking inside yourself.  When we start changing ourselves from inside out, the universe will respond to us in ways in which we could never imagine.  The ability to start manifesting your goals and dreams is already inside of you.  Take the leap to start living in joy today.

We are a pleasure seeking society. Most of us spend our energy seeking pleasure and avoiding pain. We hope that by doing this, we will feel happy. Yet deep, abiding happiness and joy elude so many people.

There is a huge difference between happiness and pleasure. Pleasure is a momentary feeling that comes from something external – a good meal, our stock going up, making love, and so on. Pleasure has to do with the positive experiences of our senses, and with good things happening. Pleasurable experiences can give us momentary feelings of happiness, but this happiness does not last long because it is dependent upon external events and experiences. We have to keep on having the good experiences – more food, more drugs or alcohol, more money, more sex, more things – in order to feel pleasure. As a result, many people become addicted to these external experiences, needing more and more to feel a short-lived feeling of happiness.


Thomas sought my counseling services because he “had everything” – his own successful business, a lovely wife and children, a beautiful home, and time to enjoy life. Yet he was not happy. While he had momentary feelings of happiness while watching a ball game or socializing with his friends, he also felt anxious and depressed much of the time. In fact, the anxiety had become so bad that he was having almost constant stomach pain, which his doctor told him was from stress.

As we worked together, it became apparent that Thomas’s main desire in life was to have control over people and events. He wanted others to do things his way and to believe the way he believed. He was frequently judgmental with his employees, wife, children and friends, believing that he was right and they were wrong and it was his job to straighten them out with his judgment and criticism. His energy would become hard and tough and he would be like a steamroller in his efforts to get his point across and get others to do things his way. When it worked and others gave in, Thomas felt a momentary pang of pleasure. But the pain in his stomach kept getting worse and worse, which is why he decided to consult with me.

Thomas also wanted control over his own feelings, and would often judge himself as harshly as he judged others in an effort to get himself to perform well and feel okay. He especially judged himself harshly when he felt rejected by others, frequently telling himself that he was an inadequate jerk.

As we worked together, Thomas began to see that happiness is the result of choosing to be a kind, caring, compassionate and gentle person with himself and others – quite the opposite of the judgmental, controlling person he had chosen to be. Thomas learned that happiness is the natural result of being present in each moment with love and kindness toward himself and others, rather than with being attached to the outcome of things and trying to control the outcome regarding events and others’ behavior. He discovered that he felt deep joy whenever he let go of control and chose caring instead. The anxiety in his stomach went away whenever his intention was to be a kind and caring person rather than a controlling one.

It is not easy to shift out of the deep devotion to control and become devoted to love and compassion toward oneself and others. Our ego wounded self has been practicing control since we were very little. Yet the moment our intent is to control, our heart closes and we feel alone and anxious inside. Our intent to seek safety and pleasure through controlling others, outcomes, and our own feelings leads to an inner feeling of abandonment and emptiness. We abandon ourselves when we are trying to control our feelings rather than be kind and compassionate with ourselves. Our anxiety and feelings of emptiness lead to more seeking outside ourselves to fill up with pleasurable experiences. The momentary pleasure leads to addictive behavior.

When the intent shifts out of controlling and not being controlled to becoming loving to ourselves and others, the heart opens and joy is the result. Deep and abiding happiness and joy are the natural result of operating out of the spiritual values of caring, compassion and kindness.

Worry is a silent killer.  It is like a slow poison.  It is a chronic illness.  In fact, it is an illness which is many fold dreadful than the physical illnesses.  Worry not only affects our body but our mind too.

If you think seriously, you would find that it is really no use worrying about anything.  It is really foolish to worry about past or future.  Nobody can change the past.  Whatever has happened has happened.  Why worry?  How can something that has yet not come to pass affect us?  How are we so certain that the future is so bleak?  Things may turn out well.  Why worry then?  Worrying just tires us and diminishes our capacity of clear thinking and planning.  It promotes negative thinking.  Instead of worrying we should use positive affirmations and resolutions.

If worry could solve the problem, everybody would worry as much as possible.  Problem solving requires clear thinking and planning.  But worry makes us incapable of clear thinking and planning.  Many things, if they are going to happen, will happen regardless of our worry.   If it is going to rain, it will.

We worry for small things.  The worst-case scenario may not even be bad enough to worry.  You have made your boss angry.  You worry that he may fire you.  What of it?  That is not the end of the world.  You are still alive.  Perhaps you would get a better job.  You dread to go to the office next day.  You think of sending in your resignation letter.  Worrying you reach office.  The boss calls you.  He apologizes.  It was his mistake!

Not only we should not worry about little things, but we should also not worry about seemingly big things. The things that seem today very big and important will seem trifle tomorrow.  In your student life you must have worried for days about the wrong answer you gave, even though you knew the right answer, to an objective type of question carrying just half mark.  How much you worried about a dress on a special occasion, meeting a boy or girl whom you fancied, or the change of residence of a friend’s family?  Do these matter a bit today?  Why worry about spilled milk, or a broken glass, or a missed bus?

Of course, no body worries for the sake of worrying.  Worry just comes into mind and then never leaves.  But many people never worry.  It seems that worrying is a sort of bad habit.   As all bad habits the habit of worrying is also difficult to get rid of.  So, in the first instance, never make worrying a habit.  Secondly, try to divert your mind.  Think of positive things.  Get busy with some physical activity.  Keep yourself away from people who are habitually worrying type and who always see the negative side of a thing.

Instead of useless worrying, one should take positive action—

BE HAPPY!

I am one of those people who can easily slip into a very negative state of mind. The slightest knockback or problem can lead to a cloud of doom descending over me, a cloud which I find hard to push away and remove. This article looks at ways in which we can fight back, to quickly get us back into a happy mode.

I used to be quite a fragile character, some would say that I was even scared of my own shadow. I was always paranoid that people were talking about me and laughing behind my back.

Even though my parents are superb, I was not a happy child or a happy teenager. I am so unlucky you see or so I thought. I walked around as if the world owed me something and would often feel very sorry for myself. I was bullied at school, it was more mental bullying rather than anything physical. I am sure that most people also get bullied and deal with it. It would leave me in a state of panic and depression. Looking back I have to say I was a bit of a wimp in reality.

I decided that enough was enough by my mid-twenties and decided it was time to toughen up. I could not continue to live my life as I had been, as I would probably be dead by the time I was fifty.




I then went about a self-help program to increase my overall self-confidence and self-esteem. I wanted to learn more about stress-management, dealing with depression, relaxation and about how to become successful in life.

What I found out over the next twelve to eighteen months would change my life forever.

These are the things I had to do:

I had to stop feeling sorry for myself. Yes I am not perfect but who is.

I had to think in a more positive way.

I had to stop worrying about the future.

I had to stop caring what other people thought of me.

I needed to smile more.

I needed to learn to relax. I now use meditation for this purpose.

I had to learn to like myself.

I needed to become stronger to fight away the negative thoughts in my head.

I needed to appreciate what I did have in life, rather than concentrating on what I had not.


I started to implement the above and it helped me no end. That horrible cloud of doom, still descended however, around once a month. When it does descend, I now write two lists. What I am happy about in life and what I am sad or worrying about. I then analyse both lists and more times than not, I am actually over-reacting.

In conclusion, life is a battle. There are good times and bad. We need to become strong and learn to think in a more positive way. We have to fight back against people who bully us and against the voices in our head who are trying to make us panic. This is not easy, however with determination people are able to turn their life around just like I have.

I used to feel anger towards the people who bullied me at school. I now feel sorry for them. They are the bad apples and I prey for them. I prey that God will one day make them pure.

One of the problems that affect us humans is a state of mind referred to as depression.

Exactly what is depression?

Why do we suddenly find ourselves stuck in a sea of inertia, unable to think positively, unable to hold on to positive thoughts, frozen in a zombie like state of inactivity?

Even experts disagree on the core causes of depression and the methods of treatment. Should they be palliative or something more uncompromising?

This is of course no help to us if we are immersed in the thickening fog of a bout of depression.

If we ever find ourselves in a state of depression we must find and build from within the strength, the motivation, the wish and the will to conquer this debilitating mind set.

First of all we have to accept that we alone allowed ourselves to drift into this parlous way of thinking.

The trigger could have been any one of a million reasons and may well have been an external event over which we had no control, however the antidote  has to be found within us and is under our control.

The first thing we need to understand is that we are not alone.

Read the newspapers and watch TV and over and over again there are accounts of people we would probably regard as ’having everything’ checking themselves into this or that clinic for help with some problem or other.

What for one person may be simply a mild set back can for another become the trigger which then sets off the internal self defeating process of the ‘poor me’ syndrome.

Why is it that a situation which is a mild irritation for one person can lead another to almost suicidal tendencies?

The answer is because we are all different in some way.

A visit to one of the many web sites offering behavioural profiling services will help you to identify your personal style as a first step to better understanding yourself

Once you understand why you react the way you do to certain situations you may then set about arranging your life so as to avoid those situations in the future or at least be better prepared to handle them when they do confront you.

Understanding yourself and why you react the way you do to situations with which you are faced is a prime initial requisite for self help with depression.

Learning, understanding and accepting that we can control what we allow to be accepted as fact by our brain is the next step. So often an initial perception turns out to be inaccurate.  Generally speaking nothing is ever so bad or, as good as it may at first appear.

What is important is to understand that it is possible for us to move to a position where we take preventative steps to ensure that we stay clear of infectious negative thoughts in the future.

Negative thoughts are the seed pearls of depression. These negative thoughts and internal video recordings of past failure and disappointment clog up our brain. They lay there dormant just waiting for the right set of circumstances to explode into action and cloud our thinking.

The late Dr. Hall, a clinical psychologist of international renown devoted his life to helping people understand who they were and then encouraging them to take the necessary steps to become who they really wanted to be.

Doctor George Hall discovered that it is possible to install a brain filter which stops negatives from being accepted by the brain. Just as we may install a virus checker or a firewall on our PC or Lap top we can install the same preventative systems in our brain.

Dr. Hall developed a personal development course called ‘Human Cybernetics’ it was a blueprint to follow for those who really did want to self improve and fully develop their potential in life.

I was privileged to be a student of Dr. Hall in 1975 and the tutorials he led were life changing for those of us fortunate enough to be exposed to his teachings.

Dangerous self talk and replaying internal tapes of past failures and disappointments he always propounded to be the most debilitating of activities a human being could engage in as this activity served only to reinforce a negative self image.

Negative self talk must immediately be replaced by constructive self talk and optimistic visual imaginings. Those negative tapes and videos in the mind must be deleted and recorded over with new images of success and achievement.

There are many self help courses available today. Try running a search on personal development or something similar and you will find many, many sites offering help and assistance much of which is free of charge.

There are also sites offering self-awareness questionnaires which are designed to help you focus on any deep seated negatives which may be holding you back from achieving your life dreams.

This may then be used by you as a platform from which to launch your new beginnings.

Self help for depression is all about taking that first step to control your future thoughts and activity.

Decide today to take charge of your life and to live it as you want to and not as others would have you live it.

Whatever you do, do it for you!

Depression and anxiety appear to be two different emotional responses humans are capable of having.  We do not usually associate these two disorders with each other. But research has shown that depression and anxiety do in fact co-exist, much to the detriment of their sufferers.

When you picture someone with depression you think of all the normal symptoms associated with it: Despair, hopelessness, anger, fatigue, an unwillingness to be a part of society and a feeling of being overwhelmed by everyday life. A depressed person withdraws into themselves and seek to sever all ties with the outside world.

Anxiety attacks on the other hand seem to happen for no reason at all. Feelings of fear and panic happen in situations in which most people would be perfectly calm. These anxiety attacks come on suddenly with no warning and with no outright reason for them to happen. After awhile a sufferer of these attacks begins to live in fear of the attacks themselves, wondering when the next one is going to happen. Before long, and without treatment, both anxiety attacks and depression can begin to affect the sufferers lives in negative ways by not allowing them to hold a job, have a relationship, or even go out into society

What many sufferers of these two diseases do not realize is that either one can lead to the other.  Being depressed can weigh heavily on the mind leading the depressed person through a maze of different emotions. This in itself can lead to anxiety and eventually panic attacks. Panic attacks signify a loss of control and when this happens more and more often the sufferer can become depressed with their situation of not knowing if and when the next attack will occur.

Why these two disorders seem to occur at the same time is still largely unknown. But many studies show that major depression is often accompanied by an anxiety disorder. Both are likely caused by an imbalance in brain chemistry, but exactly why the two seemingly opposite disorders can coexist in the same person is not completely understood. What is understood about anxiety disorder is that the fight-or-flight reaction in the brain does not work the way it is supposed to. It can go off at any time, even in seemingly peaceful situations. Those who have anxiety disorder always feel that they are in danger.

One thing that psychologist agree on is that having a combination depression and anxiety is much more debilitating than having just one or the other. It can take patients with both disorders a much longer amount of time to resolve their depression which makes treating them much harder. It has also been shown that people who suffer from anxiety and depression both have a much higher suicide rate.

While this sounds bad their are options for treating both these conditions. Anti-depressant medications can be used to treat both depression and anxiety. When these medications are used in conjunction with behavioral therapy there is a high success rate of treating depression accompanied by anxiety.

Liberate yourself - Go out and do what you like! - How long it has been since you last went to have a walk among the pines – something that you loved as a child? How long has it been when you walked hand in hand with your friend to the bakery and tossed a coin to decide what to buy? These might seem very simple things but these simple things have the power to add on to build great confidence and fulfilment. Life if see is actually quite simple. What gets a bit too complex though is to remain simple. Isn’t it? Just as small drops of water make the mighty ocean, the little things you enjoy doing have the capability to turn you into a storehouse of confidence. When God made you, He put a desire in your heart and bestowed onto you the capability to achieve it. However, in the process of growing up, you forgot what exactly your purpose was, what is that you liked and what is that you enjoyed doing. It does happen with lots and lots of people who do feel like breaking free but are too tied up in their day to day responsibilities that it gets impossible for them to spare even 10 minutes to reflect on their lives, their direction, their dreams and goals. It’s our duty to clear the mess that prevents us from hearing to our heart. The conversations with your heart should keep getting clearer and the best way to do it is to find time to do what you enjoy. And since you enjoy doing that activity, it straightaway means that you have all the aptitude and intelligence necessary to do the job effortlessly even though you may not realize it.

Find your flock - Birds of a feather flock together. You must find out people with whom you enjoy being. They are certainly the people of your frequency and the energy flow between you and them is natural. Life becomes easy when you are among the people who are more or less on the same plane of thought as you and it’s easier to relate to them. They seem to understand you and vice versa thus creating conditions for healthy conversations. A good conversation is a very healthy exercise and an important need of our mind. We all want our ideas to be heard and appreciated and a good company provides platform for the same.

Set Achievable Goals and Go for it! - The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. The idea is to begin with a small single step that can then further developed into giant strides. Learn to do the work at hand rather than to overwhelm oneself by looking at the entirety of a mammoth looking task. Just like the soil underneath your foot, the top of mountain too would someday be under your step. The only way to do something is to GO FOR IT! No matter how small the progress is the focus should be on completing a task successfully even though it’s a small task. A series of big uncompleted task is a sure shot way to depression. Break a big task into a list of small tasks to be completed. Tick off from your list each job successfully completed. A completed task no matter how small it is gives a sense of achievement that boosts our confidence and equips us with more energy to try a bigger task.

Although IQ tests measure a certain aspect of intelligence potential, there isn’t complete agreement that what is being measured is actually intelligence.

Standard intelligence tests focus a lot on exploring and measuring linguistic/logical/mathematical ability.  But is that really the same quality as intelligence?  Or is intelligence something broader than that?

We have all met people who have a lot of “book smarts” but seem to have no “life smarts.”  Should we really be saying that they are intelligent?  Some people who did poorly in school often turn out to be very successful in later life.  Why do our current IQ tests seem unable to predict or explain these outcomes?

A person may have failed dismally in school, and yet turn out to be a genius in marketing.  Is this person stupid, or brilliant?  If a man is a great scientist, but can’t ever pick a suitable mate, is he really very smart?

Was Picasso inept because he wasn’t also a brilliant mathematician?  Was Einstein inadequate because he wasn’t also a great artist?

Which of these two men had more intelligence?  Is there more than one kind of intelligence?  How should we define intelligence?  Can we really measure it?  What is intelligence, really?

Several experts in the field of intelligence have proposed that we need to broaden our understanding of what intelligence really is, and the role it plays in successful living.

Psychologist Howard Gardner of Harvard University has suggested that we should consider a wide range of talents and abilities as valid forms of intelligence.

In his intriguing book, “Frames of Mind: Theories of Multiple Intelligences”,  Gardner has proposed the existence of at least seven types of intelligence: verbal-linguistic, logical-mathematical, visual-spatial, musical, bodily-kinesthetic, social-interpersonal and intra-personal.

Another psychologist, Robert Sternberg, has suggested we consider three distinct forms of intelligence.  One type is the ability to think logically and rationally, doing well in an academic type of environment.

A second kind of intelligence identified by Sternberg is the ability to come up with creative solutions to real life situations.  And the third type, according to Sternberg, is the ability to psychologically understand people and interact effectively with them.

A very different perspective on the IQ issue is presented by Daniel Goleman in his best-selling book, “Emotional Intelligence”.   Goleman offers an explanation for why a high IQ does not always lead to success in career or in life.

He says that EQ, or emotional intelligence, has been an overlooked factor that is an extremely important ingredient for success in life.  An ability to get along with others, to be optimistic, to be determined, are among the many factors that contribute to success, perhaps even more than intellectual ability.

Are you starting to realize that intelligence is not just a question of one test score number that forever limits your possibilities?  If we define intelligence primarily as an aptitude for mathematical and linguistic/logical thinking, we may be missing other forms of intelligence that are also important.

If you happen to know your own IQ score, don’t think of it as something that limits or defines your potential.  If your IQ is in the average range it does not in any way mean you are limited to a life of average success and average accomplishment.  If your IQ is in the above average range, it does not guarantee you a life of ease.  You can’t use either a high IQ score or a low one as an excuse not to try very hard.

Your IQ score is only a number.  It does not define you.  It does not really limit you.  It’s just a starting point.  Remember that many other qualities you already possess or can develop are also important for success in life.